"Where is my warm cozy place?"

Before Lincoln had surgery, we got to see his pretty dark, blue eyes a lot. He seemed to always have the same look on his face....concern. I think this comes from Shane. I know his brain he is thinking, "Where am I? Where is that warm cozy place? And why are all these strange people touching me?!" I just love his concerned little face with his worried eyebrow look....reminds me of Shane!

Today was a pretty rough day, I was discharged about 9:00 this morning but the nurses let me hang around until I was ready to leave. We finally left the hospital around noon. I am not sure which was harder, watching the nurse take him to surgery or leaving my baby behind in the hospital while I went home. It was very hard for me. My family and Shane's mom were all at home to help me and Shane and it was a blessing. I think if it had just been Shane and I then I would have sat in Lincoln's room and just cried. I was able to take a nap and rest all day which was nice. My mind has been on Lincoln all day and each time I walk by his room it makes me sad and I know it will be a struggle until he comes home. We went back to the hospital this evening and it was comforting to his sweet face again....it was only half a day but I missed that sweet boy! The nurses say he is doing the best he can in his situation. They are slowly still taking him off his sedation so he is starting to "wake up" a little more. He will open his slightly but you can tell that he is still very "groggy". My mom feels that he is probably have crazy, colorful, drug-induced dreams at the moment. It is better see him now than he was a day ago. The day of surgery and yesterday he was still and pretty lifeless which was hard to watch. Now he is moving his hands and feet (if you know me well, then you will be understand when I say he moves his feet like me when he sleeps!) a little and it is fun to sit and watch patiently until you see him move...it is the little things to bring me excitement! We are not supposed to be stimulating him and it is so hard to sit and not touch him, we pretty much have to keep our hands in our pockets to keep from reaching in and keeping him up! He looks so cuddly! We have snuck a few touches while the nurses aren't watching...Shhhh! Don't tell the nurses! When Shane or I talk to him you can see his little body twitch or eyelids move, I believe he knows our voices. That is about all the updates we have. Nothing major should be happening until Monday or Tuesday.

Here is picture of his long, skinny feet. My mom's side of the family has long features and I think Lincoln inherited the long fingers and feet from them. This picture was taken before the IV was taken out of his foot today. He is IV free on his feet...YAY!! It looked like it hurt!
Not sure why this picture posted twice but it did so you can see his sweet face again!

I love this picture of Lincoln with his "cuddle doll". I was told to wear this cloth doll under my shirt for 24 hours after Lincoln was placed in NICU. Now they place the doll on his face so that my scent can be with him all the time. I think it is very sweet and it is funny to see his face all covered up. We can take it off when we go see him but it stays on all the other times. So this how Lincoln spends his days and nights under a heat lamp. Looks so relaxing to me...minus all the IVs and tubes!

Well that is about it from the Nimz house. We are just trying to get through each day (sometimes the hour!) and work our day around going to see him at the hospital. It is still hard and I don't think it will be get easy but each day that passes means we are one day closer to getting him home!

I don't think I can say it enough but thank you to everyone who reads this blog (whether you comment or not) and prayers for our baby boy. We can not express how much it means to us!

Until next time,

Carrie